You are so important to support a loved one through their cancer journey. Litte small touches can make huge differences, but there’s a lot for you to understand as well. Here are some things to consider:

Educate yourself

If you don’t already know, learn what a stoma is and how it impacts daily life. Why not check out this article to understand the background and some challenges?

Encourage communication

Hearing about a cancer diagnosis can be difficult for you too but try and listen actively to your loved one, giving them space to open up in their own time and share their thoughts, expressing their feelings and concerns.

Allow privacy

That being said, respect your loved one’s privacy. They may not be ready to talk or share details about their stoma, give time and space and allow them discretion for changes so they do not feel self-conscious.

Offer help

Be direct with your offers. Instead of asking how you can help, be specific –

• Can I cook you meals?
• Do you need anything from the supermarket?
• Where is your lawn mower and let me cut the grass?
• Can I take you to your next appointment?

Think of small things that might help – a direct offer can be easier to accept than trying to think of an exact task when asked.

Be flexible

Stoma routines can be unpredictable – especially during chemotherapy plus your loved one is going though a lot of change. Understand things can change last minute and try and be flexible and accommodating as needed.

Embrace optimism

This last one we say knowing that each person’s journey will be different so being full on optimism isn’t going to be the right tone for every conversation. You can however remain positive and caring, actively listening and encouraging. We have called this series Thriving Beyond Today – going through a cancer diagnosis, stoma creation and subsequent chemotherapy is a lot for anyone to deal with, it is life changing – but it is not life limiting, in fact read through the rest of this series to see how others have thrived with their stoma.